[Tavia’s Point of View]
Trying to regain control of my actions, I slightly loosened my grip on Damian. He pushed me away and stood up tall, fixing his stature back into the heartless fox he is. He looked at me with the eyes of a liar. All I was doing was waiting for a response, an explanation, and he’s careless enough to keep me waiting so long. Why would my father still be alive, and not come to look for me once? Why?
“It was all a lie,” he began softly.
As if it wasn’t obvious enough, he just had to highlight the past two years of my entire life.
“Michael’s death was fake, all planned by him and I. We were only trying to deal with Dominic, but who would’ve guessed that it dragged out so long, and that so many people would get involved. Michael was planning on looking for you, after we get our company back so that he could repay you properly for all those lost years. It was fate that you two met tonight.”
I only laughed quietly at his words. A man like Damian would expect me to believe that? “Stop lying to me. What kind of father is he if he’s willing to wait twenty long years to take revenge, while in those twenty years never bother to look for his own daughter once?” I asked him. I could feel the tears coming to my eyes as I glared at my so-called uncle. “And who would’ve thought so many people would be involved?” I laughed once again. “Uncle Damian, those people never intended to get involved, it was you who dragged them all into this mess, and now you’re pushing the blame away?”
“Tavia listen, I know you’re upset because you found out your father is still alive,” he began.
“My father is dead!” I interrupted him as the tears fell. “That man in there is not my father, he’s not the man I once looked up to and loved. He’s a different person now.”
“Listen, he really loves you. It’s just his pride that he can’t see his daughter until he can see her with his head up and support her properly.” Damian tried to explain.
“Pride?!” I asked him. “And you’re talking to me about pride?” I let out a bitter laugh that even I couldn’t believe. “I’m the one who had to swallow my pride, lie to the man I love, pull away from the only true friend I ever had, deceive everyone I know, just for something you and him want. Now you’re talking to me about his pride? What has he done?” I asked, pointing to the building behind us with anger building in me. “Everyone thinks he’s dead! For twenty years, he left me fighting for myself on the street! Has he ever stopped to consider that I don’t need money as support? Has he ever stopped to consider that at least having a father is better that none? Twenty years uncle, he’s hid from me for twenty years. I’m done with all of this. If you two want that company back then it’s all your business. I’m out.”
I tried to walk away, but a strong grip suddenly held me back. I knew the grip didn’t belong to Damian, and when I looked up at the man, all the pain and anger inside me just mixed together, and it all hurts so badly.
“You’re my daughter?” he asked me in a shaky voice.
“It’s not like it’ll make a difference.” I replied coldly to him, shaking his arm off hard.
“Tavia,” he called out, his voice as gentle as I remembered, each time he called out my name.
I turned around. “You’re not my dad! I hate you!” I screamed. “My dad died twenty years ago!”
“Tavia listen to me!” he called after.
I suddenly turned and ran, ran far away from them. I quickly got into my car and started the loud engine before he could catch up. Looking in the rearview mirror, I watched as the aging man chased my speeding car, only giving up when his breath ran out and his limbs reached their limit. I couldn’t stop myself from crying. The first words I say to my father after twenty years apart were the words ‘I hate you’.
Unable to believe neither myself nor my night, I pushed forward on the gas pedal, launching my car into a full outburst of speed and anger. I hate him for lying to me, for abandoning me for twenty years, but I know clear and well that a strong part of me is still dying to call him dad and watch him smile. I pulled my hand up to cover my face as I cried so hard while still speeding down the empty road.
“Mom,” I quietly whispered when I forced my car to an abrupt stop facing the ocean.
My heart and mind wished so hard that my mom would be here right now. She would know what to do. But the awful truth is, unlike the lie my dad had given me for twenty years, my mother is truly dead in the fire, and she won’t be here to guide me. What should I do when I meet my father again after so long, only to find out that he’s lied to me for twenty years, and abandoned me to solitude for so long? I hate the feeling rushing through me. It was such a confusing emotion that I couldn’t understand no matter how hard I try. I want to call him dad again, but yet I couldn’t forgive him for what he made me go through. All I wanted was some answers, and when I got them they turned out to be confessions. Tonight was the night when I could no longer tell between truths and lies. If my own father could do that to me, what about all the people around me? I was the one who dragged them into this mess, so what do they think of me? Could I just be a foolish girl being used by everyone? I kept crying, slamming on my steering wheel as I tried to recover.
~*~
[Ron’s Point of View]
With hesitation consuming me and a worried Nancy at my back, I pushed forward on the white door, walking into the apartment I once shared with Bernice. This was the last and only place we know to look for her, and judging from the small messes around the room, Bernice had been here. Maybe she was still around.
“Bernice?” Nancy called softly. I could hear the awkwardness in her voice as she spoke.
I turned and spotted Bernice, sober on the floor behind my glass coffee table. I quickly rushed over to her and helped her up. “Bernice,” I called her, and her eyes opened up at me. “Bernice are you okay?”
As I placed her gently on the sofa, I suddenly saw Nancy rush out of my kitchen with a warm, wet towel in her hand. Nancy then placed the towel on Bernice’s forehead with care, and knelt beside me as Bernice woke up from her drunken state. She sat up slowly, but immediately she took my arms and pulled me closer to her. Her head was on my shoulder, and I could feel the tears leave her eyes and fall upon my shirt.
“Ron,” she sobbed with great pain and sadness. “Ron, please stay. I love you and I don’t care what you do. I already know about everything, but I’m willing to let it all go. Just please stay with me.” She pleaded me while holding me tight. In all my life I’ve never seen Bernice this broken and falling apart.
“Bernice,” I began as I glanced to the side at Nancy. She was just sitting there in silence, watching with sympathy as the drunken Bernice hugged me tighter. “Bernice, I’m sorry.”
“No, don’t apologize,” Bernice cut in. “Ron I love you so much, and I know I need you. Please, just forget everything and stay with me.” She looked at me with teary eyes, seeming more awake and aware of her surroundings. She then turned to Nancy, taking Nancy’s arm and again, pleading her like she did with me. “Nancy, please, please let Ron stay with me. Please tell me that the baby isn’t Ron’s and that it’s Kenneth’s. Please tell me that this was all a joke. Please Nancy,” she continued to beg.
It was like I was feeling it myself. Nancy was caught speechless. It was Nancy to feel sad and empathy for a drunken person, on her knees and begging. “Bernice,” I called. “Nothing can change, the baby is mine and I’m really sorry.” I was trying to break it to her easily, and trying not to hurt Nancy as well. Being a good person is so hard.
“Nancy please,” she continued. “Please tell me this is all a lie.”
Nancy watched as the endless tears streamed from Bernice’s eyes. She only turned away in shame, and I could see the hidden emotions inside Nancy begin to rise up to the surface. “She reminds me of myself,” I heard Nancy whisper quietly.
“Nancy,” I sighed, hugging her and feeling sad as Bernice watched us. “Bernice, again I’m sorry. I’m sorry to ever cause you all this pain and trouble, but…” I glanced at Nancy who avoided my eyes. “I love Nancy too much to lie to you or anyone else.”
“No,” Bernice shook her head. “No, this can’t be true!” she screamed, covering her ears so she could no longer hear us.
“Bernice I’m sorry,” I began to raise my voice a little. “I’m sorry it hurts but I can’t lie to myself and I can’t lie to you anymore.”
“Ron, please,” she begged me. She then turned back to Nancy, her tears flowing down harder as she gripped Nancy’s arms tightly, pleading on the ground. “Please Nancy, I can’t let Ron go. I’m not as strong as you, please Nancy. I know I’ve hurt you a lot before but please. I’m not as strong as you Nancy,” she sobbed.
“Bernice that’s enough,” I spoke with my voice rising again.
She pulled back, staring at us both in disbelief. The tears never stopped falling from her eyes, and they did nothing more than cause pain to all of us in the room.
I felt sad to see such a strong woman come to her knees in tears, all because of love. I felt even sadder to know that I was the main reason she’s become like this, but all I ever felt for Bernice was sadness. But Nancy, as I watched her reason with herself in her mind, wondering about Bernice’s pleads, I felt pain and worry. Pain was because I couldn’t watch Nancy have to worry so much, and worry because I fear Nancy might doubt me. For Nancy, I worry, fear, and love so much more than anything else. That was why hurting Bernice, was a bearable task for me. I felt heartless admitting so, but I’m a coward if I don’t.
“Nancy,” I sighed, hoping she’ll pull away from her doubts and listen to me.
“Bernice,” Nancy spoke softly, ignoring my call completely.
~*~
[Raymond’s Point of View]
Driving home, tonight I decided to take a more open and empty road rather than the crowded streets. I took a path beside the beach, driving home and hoping to enjoy the view at the same time. Though I didn’t have the mind to look at the view, I was too busy wrapped up over many things. Today one of the executives suggested an important topic to my mind. He asked when we will have the next board meeting. I laughed quietly to myself, wondering how I should answer him. I knew very well that the next board meeting could be my last, since Damian will be there and no doubt he will be slyly playing tricks behind my back.
Confused and searching for an answer, I turned to the thin, tan envelope sitting on the passenger seat. I stared between it and the road for a minute, wondering if I’m doing the right thing. Michelle said that I am, so why don’t I feel right? Instead, I feel that this path I’m going on will only bring me more troubles.
The moment I finally looked back up at the road my car swallowed, I spotted a very familiar car, parked to the side. I slowed down and closed in on it, soon to realize that the car belonged to Tavia. Quickly I came to a stop and got out of the car, looking for her. I didn’t want to call out her name, only to surprise her. Then, I found her sitting on a large rock at the shores. Smiling, I rushed over to her glad to know that she’s always the one who can take the worries off my mind, even if for just a short moment.
As I neared I heard her crying. She was crying quietly to herself. I closed in slowly and softly wrapped my arms around her. I could feel her jump a little in my arms, but then she knew it was me. “Tavia, what’s wrong?”
She only shook her head and turned around to hug me, nothing more and nothing less.
“Tavia, tell me. What’s wrong and why are you crying?” I asked her, gently wiping away her tears. “Please don’t keep it all inside.”
I saw her lingering for a moment, but then her lips finally quivered and talked. She hugged me tighter while I heard her say, “Raymond, my dad is still alive.” The news hit me like a rock. “It’s all been a lie. For twenty years, my life had been a lie,” she spoke softly as she rested her head on my shoulder, hugging me tightly.
“Y…your father, Michael Yeung, is still alive?” I asked again in disbelief.
She nodded.
It took me a moment, but after I processed the thoughts, I found a smile to show to her. “Then you should be happy,” I spoke. “Your father is still alive, that means that you now have a family, and you’ve still got me.”
“Raymond you don’t understand,” she spoke immediately after. “He’s lied to me for twenty years. He and Damian both lied to me like I’m nothing more than a pawn in their game. If that man really cared about me as his daughter he would’ve gone to look for me, but he didn’t. I can’t believe we were so close, but yet I never found him. He still lives here in Hong Kong, and yet he never thought of me.”
“Tavia don’t cry,” I spoke, unable to stand seeing her this way. “No matter what, you’ve still got me.” I held her back to look into her eyes, telling her that I’m serious and I’ll never lie to her. “You’ve still got me here, and I love you Tavia Yeung.”
She pulled me closer and I did the same.
We stood there for what felt like a very long time. I held her close as she cried, and I watched the waves come into our feet, twirling around them and then pulling back into the ocean. If only we weren’t born in such families, we’d have normal lives, and instead of crying over lies and betrayals, we’d be at family gatherings or parties, having fun and actually smiling.
Though I’ve never been in Tavia’s shoes, I could tell and feel all her pain. I felt so close to her, standing beside her. It was then that I finally knew what Ron meant by the emotions of love. Even when I’m facing the toughest times, as long as I’m with the one I love, everything will always work out. With Tavia in my arms, it gave me confident about the upcoming board meeting. For some unexplained reason, the worried feeling I had earlier disappeared completely.
“Raymond, I love you,” Tavia whispered beside my ear. Those words brought immense warmth to me as I was mesmerized by each and every one.
I smiled. “Tavia I love you more than anything,” I spoke back to her, hugging her tighter.
I could feel her smile, and she reached up to kiss me. We held the kiss, lingered it for a sweet moment then full on launched it into a passionate embrace with a feeling only Tavia Yeung could give me. I didn’t push the kiss though, this time Tavia was the one leading and I enjoyed sitting in the backseat. I felt a strong, loving feeling soaring inside me.
After a while, we finally pulled back. Looking into her dark brown eyes, I smiled. “We should go home now, to my house.”
She nodded, and I took her hands.
“Don’t let it bother you, I’ll always be here and I’ll never lie to you,” I promised her as we walked back. I held her hand in mine, never wanting to let go.
~*~
[Nancy’s Point of View]
It became quiet when Bernice fell asleep. She drifted off unwillingly when the hangover phase hit her like a rock. Sleeping soundly on Ron’s sofa, I brought a blanket to her, covering her with its warmth knowing that I won’t be staying here any longer. Then I sat down, kneeling beside her and thought really hard. Bernice’s pleading and crying earlier really did its job, working its way into my mind and bringing me many considerations I wouldn’t have thought of before tonight. I watched her sleep and turn slightly in place as I wondered about what she said. I still remembered her words very clearly.
“I’m not as strong as you, please Nancy. I’m not as strong as you.” I remembered her say.
When she cried and pained it made me sad to watch. She reminded me very much of myself when Ron’s heart turned the other way. When Bernice told me that she wasn’t as strong as me, those words brought a thought into my mind. In this three people world, obviously one will get hurt. Then I began to wonder, would it only be fair if only one person got hurt instead of two? I already got hurt before, that made one person. And now Bernice is getting hurt, that makes two. If I can take Bernice’s pain away, wouldn’t it be a lot fairer that way?
I shook my head, trying to free myself of those thoughts. Suddenly I couldn’t help but wonder, if Ron had hurt me before, and he had the heart to hurt Bernice now, what could be in store for me when his heart once again turns the opposite direction? I sat to think for a moment, but then I stopped myself. I shouldn’t doubt Ron, not after everything we’ve gone through, and not after my decision to stay with him and our baby.
“Nancy,” Ron’s gentle words glided past me as he placed his arms around me. “Don’t take what Bernice said to heart. She’s just really drunk right now,” he comforted.
“I know,” I lied. I couldn’t stop her words from going into my heart and making me think deeper into this three people world we live in.
“Let’s go, it’s getting late. We could go back to your place and I’ll stay there with you if you want me to,” he spoke softly beside me, putting in more tender love and care than usual.
“Ron,” I began to speak without really thinking. “How are you going to face Bernice?”
“I don’t know,” he sighed.
“Look how much we’ve hurt her,” I sighed. “She reminded me so much of myself when you left.” I could help but think back to those desperate times.
“Nancy,” he called to me but I didn’t listen.
“She and I were so alike. You hurt me before like this too, and now you’re at my side. Are you going to face Bernice like this too? In the future, after you change your mind and regret everything?” I couldn’t hold myself back. As if I had no control over myself, I asked Ron what shouldn’t have been said. I was foolish.
“Nancy,” he spoke, piercing deeply into my heart with his entrancing stare. “I promised I’d never hurt you ever again, and I will keep that promise no matter what. I won’t change my mind or regret anything. I couldn’t risk hurting you again because seeing you hurt is something I can’t bear watching. Nancy, please don’t think too much, I love you, a whole lot more than I could ever say.”
His every word touched me and with them I felt the warmth and reassurance that I had lost for a moment. But turning back to Bernice, I don’t know how I could ever face her. Though we were never close, I just couldn’t explain why I can’t bear to hurt her so much. In this relationship, she was not the third person, I was.
“Nancy,” Ron called again, pulling me closer to him. “When I left you before, I didn’t know what I had until I lost it. I’m sorry it took me so long to realize, but when I didn’t see you in my life, I always felt that there was a part of me missing. Please Nancy, let’s go home.”
I didn’t want to hurt Ron, and thinking deeper into this was only causing us more pain. “I’m sorry, I was just thinking too much,” I sighed, leaning back into his loving embrace. I closed my eyes and leaned on him, taking in a deep breath. “Let’s go home, I’m tired.”
I could feel his nod, and without struggle, he easily picked me up and carried me out the door.
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